What? You’re still on Tinder?

The single most disruptive tech on the dating scene may have also been the single most destructive tech to your love life. Think about how it would lead to nothing but the inevitable ending of a dating fatigue, with the culprit being carcinogenic practices like ghosting, flaking, catfishing, benching, cuffing, and a whole dictionary of dating vocabulary that made me give up caring.

Although the vicious swiping cycle does leave one worse for wear, remember that you are still in control of what you want to make out of the app. So what if that hot Tinderella is not as DTF as you’d thought? Or that the love of your life the moment slipped away because you swiped left a little too impulsively?

You could always have an orgasm of another kind (short of your right hand) – in the brain.

Because even after all your preconceived notions about it conceiving only hook-ups, STDs, and unwanted babies, Tinder could really be contrived as a school for creativity and an IQ upgrade. You will agree with me when you check out 11 of the wittiest pick-up lines that the Seriously Man team has scoured from the world wide web, personal experiences and the deep recesses of our own great minds.

Be inspired, connect with your sapiosexuality, and outsmart the Tinder funk.

We are wondering too.


She could care less if you’re an extrovert or an introvert – ’tis the only type that matters.


Get the shopaholics to swipe right, not their credit cards.


The best kind of videos are the most interactive ones. If she needs more convincing, tell her that it won’t ever get leaked.


What is the point of beating around the bush?


Potential follow-up: Invite her to challenge the proverb that the pen-is mightier than the sword.


Well, you know what they say about karma.


As for you, bring along some prophylactic in case the line works a little too well. *Wink*


A lesson in how to use emojis to devastating effect.


On the topic of wittiness, it never hurts to showcase your inner Shakespeare.


Cue ‘A Whole New World’.